💥 40. LOYALTY IS NOT A RECOVERY PLAN

The line between love and self-abandonment is blurry—until it costs you everything.


I stayed longer than I should have.
Gave more than I had.
Carried people who never once tried to walk.

Because I thought loyalty meant never giving up.
No matter what.


I thought leaving made me selfish.
I thought staying made me strong.

I thought love was proved by pain tolerance.

And when it hurt?
I dug deeper.
When they broke me?
I gave them glue.


But loyalty without reciprocity
is just a slow suicide.


I was faithful to people
who were faithless with my heart.
I defended the ones who destroyed me.
I said, “They’re just hurting too,”
while bleeding out from the wounds they handed me.


And I called it healing.
Recovery.
Growth.
Forgiveness.

But it wasn’t.
It was fear.
It was codependence in a martyr costume.


I was loyal to dysfunction
because it was familiar.
Because choosing myself felt like betrayal.


Until I realized:

No one is worth saving if it means losing yourself.


Loyalty isn’t love.
It’s not recovery.
It’s not proof of healing.

Not if it costs you your peace.
Your voice.
Your f*cking sanity.


So I rewrote my vows.
This time, to me.


🧠 Emotional Takeaway:

Being loyal to the wrong people
is a trauma response—
not a virtue.

Healing means drawing the line
where you used to build bridges.


🪞 Reflection Box:

I used to call it commitment.
Now I call it what it was:
self-abandonment dressed up as devotion.

And I’m done handing out pieces of myself
just to prove I’m lovable.


🎤 I pledged myself to sinking ships,
With bloodied hands and bitten lips.
They loved me most when I would stay—
But healing meant I walked away.

No badge for pain. No prize for scars.
No sainthood found in broken hearts.
So here’s my line, and here I stand—
Loyalty is not my plan.

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You’re not tipping a brand. You’re tipping a person. This is me—no filters, no performance, just raw survival turned into purpose. If this hit something real in you, throw a dollar in the jar. Not because you owe me. Because maybe it helps you keep going, too. This is how I fund the real work. The truth-telling. The healing. The absolute audacity of still standing. Thank you for being here with me.

This time, recovery is from all of it. Screw steps. Screw perfection. No shame here. Just stories. What saved you, or what you saved yourself from? What are you healing from?

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