2. My Family Thinks I’m Possessed

Creepy creature beside "Out of My Mind" sign

Good. Let ‘em pray about it.

They won’t say it to my face—my family’s more into passive-aggressive potlucks and cryptic group texts—but you can feel it.
It’s in the way they flinch when I use words like “boundary” or “therapy.”
It’s in the awkward silences after I say something uncomfortably honest…
like “I’m not coming over if Uncle WhatshisName is still allowed near women.”

They think I’ve been taken over.
And you know what?

I have.

I’ve been possessed by something radical and supernatural:
👉 Clarity.
👉 Standards.
👉 A spine.
👉 The audacity to heal where I wasn’t supposed to survive.

They don’t recognize me anymore.
Because I stopped contorting myself into a version of “fine” that made them comfortable.
I stopped apologizing for existing.
I stopped showing up to emotional crime scenes wearing a smile and bringing pie.

Now I say “no” like a period, not a negotiation.
Now I make eye contact when I say, “That was abuse.”
Now I let the silence land and sit there while they twitch in their lawn chairs.

So yes, I’m “different.”
Yes, I’m “cold.”
Yes, I “changed.”

Possessed?
Hell yeah.
By the ghost of every version of me that died trying to make them proud.
She came back. Wearing combat boots. And holding receipts.

I don’t shapeshift anymore.
I don’t shrink to fit the family photo.
I don’t show up unless I’m spiritually hydrated and emotionally armed.

These days, I arrive like an IRS audit with glitter:
Uninvited, undeniable, and a total violation of their expectations.

They think I’m under a spell.
And maybe I am.

It’s called:
“Not This Sh*t Again.”

So let ‘em stare. Let ‘em whisper.
Because if reclaiming my identity looks like possession to them?

I hope the demon’s unionized.
And we’re just getting started.

 My Family Thinks I’m Possessed 

They say I’m cursed, a total mess, But really, I just said “no” with finesse. 

They prayed for demons, called a priest, I booked a spa and found my peace.

Possessed? You bet—by calm and sass, By therapy tools and zero f*cks to pass. 

They miss the puppet I used to be, But honey, I’m fully ghosted—and free.

—The Funny Phoenix, spinning heads with boundaries

Colorful jukebox-style tip jar labeled "JOKES

Put a Dollar in the Juke (Joke) Box

This Whirld runs on punchlines and petty cash. Tips help fund emotional damage with a comedic twist. Humor kept me alive—now it pays the therapy bills. Every dollar helps. Every laugh heals. Or at least distracts. So, if you’ve ever laughed out loud, felt seen, heard, or just temporarily less insane (you're welcome) thanks to Christy, consider:

👉 Throwing a buck in the trauma jukebox to keep the jokes flowing.
👉 Supporting a sad clown with a sarcasm addiction

Because laughter might be free — but keeping the lights on sure isn’t.

Laugh cry overshare funniest thing that ever happened to you when you were losing your s***–go.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Share to Facebook
Tweet This Story
Pin This Story
Post it to Threads

Follow

-The Funny Farm-

About Us

If this place sparked something in you—or just made you feel a little less alone while mentally spiraling—drop a tip in the flame fund. I built this place while burning out. Now it runs on caffeine, survival grit, and scrolls of half-sane truth.